The Goops is a book I fondly remember from my childhood, both for being one of the books I first recall reading and for the delightful sing-songy rhythm of the poems, that schooled children in the art of manners. I sure didn’t want to be a Goop!
From the original “Table Manners”:
The Goops they lick their fingers, And the Goops they lick their knives;
They spill their broth on the tablecloth– Oh, they lead disgusting lives!
The Goops they talk while eating, And loud and fast they chew;
And that is why I’m glad that I Am not a Goop–are you?
It occurred to me that this tale could do with an update, and not for children but for the deplorable lack of table manners in our current society, where the need to be connected all the time, ironically enough, causes us to be disconnected from real life.
The Goops they text while eating, and loud as fast they squawk
On their phone, never alone, with the need to continually talk
The Goops they think they’re special, their self importance skewed
But in fact they look sad, and obnoxiously bad, not to mention radically rude!